As a kid I have always learnt to do things myself. Seldom there were someone there for me to figure out what my next step will be and encouraging me to do well . It might have been my dad or teachers or even elders ,but whether it be in the beginning or at the end I have always realized that "no one is there to help you out. You have to do everything by yourself. They will only give a glimpse of your route or make a rough decision on you based upon what they think you have the potential of. " I had just passed my grade ten and had to make decision of what faculty I was going pursue and where . It really didn't matter to me at most but I did had to lift my ass off the bench. I knew my college would be in stone's throw and I would be taking science like good school boy . And I did enroll . Now I'm here passed +2 or whatever they call college, and going through whole lots of messed up shit from no where or is it just me or are there else. I am completely up and down and great thing is I still don't have a clear idea what I'm doing. People near me think he is doing OK or a great job. Some even have thoughts like "his son is studying engineering "and often give me oath that "you will build my house. " I am like a kind of example piece to some. It's just that I get pseudo proud feeling and think I'm really doing good. Not a peaceful time I had there in village with my parents, I got the news that I was late in rat race. Leave what my parents said or do, I myself couldn't stand the days after I got the news of the race. Maybe the mini envy, feeling of responsible child or the force of tradition of Nepalese students that pulled me to nasty capital from the beloved land beyond the mountains . And began the journey of a studious boy and a responsible child. The preparation sucked marrow and the test licked my bones. I knew I wasn't alone as I could see dark circles around eyes of who ever I met. In fact I was among the one who didn't possess it. Everyone I met there, I could see a fear and anxiety in their eyes and words. The process they have created by which a student follows to get into a nice college actually sucks . It may seem easy for good ranked student and to a very low ranked one but the rest they are left in dilemma. These students are not sure where they are going to end up and on top of that some student don't even know what they will pursue further. It really makes me sad and angry at same time. See, a student can't get enrolled into top college as per his rank and s/he has to choose a government college far from his home. Even if s/he doesn't attain enough rank to enroll into govt college , there's another maze waiting for him or her. That student gets admitted into a private colleges for s/he has insure seat if their name is not out in govt. college . But in case his/her name is out then they take chunks of money from the very student without putting any hard work. And it's OK and absolutely legal. This leave students like me in a position that they can't do thing creatively or make a definite decision for they fill forms in dozens of college and in dozens of subjects. And they fall into the trap of so created maze. They say it was by politicians for the sake of money and I think it's correct adding upon thoughts that student should made free upon making their decisions and the dogmatic conceptions that they are bonded with as a so-called traditions. This adds that even though parents tell their children to do what ever they want ,they get trapped into a bigger maze then before. S/he goes blank for they don't know what they really want. Now a days we often come across students saying they don't have any passion or talents. And it's obvious that a student will not have because s/he was taught to become a just academic genius leave it aside whether s/he can achieve or not. S/he is not raised and educated the way they are comfortable with. You visit a school and see how judgement of students are made . Ask a parents how is their child (forget on what basis you're are talking about)? And most interesting , ask a school student who is smartest? The answer you receive will amaze you. And it's true. School judge students based on rank of test paper even though some teacher they flatter that they don't care test scores. It's obvious a parents will judge a student based on his academic progress. As a kid I have always been a nice and studious boy at the same time . Everyone expected me to do well and it's true I did do well regarding the piece of paper upon which they judge me. I didn't fail in any test/exam I have taken. Most of the times I have been my teachers' favourite and as far as I remember I didn't miss any class or homework intentionally. Now I realize that's my worst mistake I have ever committed. I didn't realize what I need to learn to a successful man. If you ask me what do I know beside these academic, I will have hard times answering those and will not please you either. The biggest mistake that we make is we don't or avoid mistakes and even avoided to commit mistakes. Mistakes not only teaches you but also help you see the world from another view too. It give you strength progressing and achieving. Seems simple when you hear Einstein proverb but it a lit when you realize what he is actually saying.
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